'", "Once a student asked me what I wanted to do when I grow up.
Classroom Coding & Robotics … Everything You Need to Get Started, Protected: Classroom Talk-to-Text Project, 5 Ways Reading Great Books Helps Students Conquer Standardized Tests, Join the WeAreTeachers Influencer Network.


“I used to write my name in cursive.

It happens when your kids are super chatty and you can’t get a word in, let alone any instruction. During a study on “Westward Expansion” a student raiders their hand and said, “What are cow hands? I told him that wasn't possible, but he insisted. He was 16. Plus, the most surprising things teachers say. ", "One of my students asked me when the world stopped being in black and white and changed to color.

One of my precocious little pre-K girls said to me, “Oh Mrs. S. you just need a wine cooler.”  —Deana S. 14.

"One of my pre-kindergarteners was squirming as we lined up for lunch. Come and share in our WeAreTeachers HELPLINE group on Facebook. Teacher: “Do you like to do your homework in the morning, after school, or at night?” “Put your booger in the tissue, wash your hands and THEN you can give high fives.” —@knell926, “We don’t put carrots up our nose.” @katieellis1209, “We keep erasers out of our noses.” —@defsteph11, “It’s not OK to chase your neighbor with a booger.” —@kristinehunt0720, “Stop seeing how far the pencil will go up your nose.” —@goobermnster, “Please don’t clean the whiteboard with your tongue.” —@mrs.nti, “We don’t chew on our friends’ ears, Michael.” —@jamillexo, “We don’t eat our clothes.” —@appstatekst, “We don’t play the piano with our tongues.”— @sbabirak, “Please don’t chew on the books.” —@punnypwny, “We don’t eat the crayons.” —@aishataverasb, “Please do not put the bathroom doorknob in your mouth.” —@mcneelycf, “Please don’t lick your shoes.” —@mcneelycf, “Don’t eat the air freshener.” —@e_stuebs, “Why is there a chewed up shoe in your desk?” —@rvayers, “You dropped your phone in the what? I hate you less than others.” —Polly W. 15.

A black student was singing in the back of my Trigonometry class when my (white) teacher says, “Quit singing Marvel, were not on the fields.”. Cheese. Stacy Tornio is a senior editor with WeAreTeachers. 12. He replied, 'Hamburgers come from hamburger farms, Miss. “You’re pretty for an old person.” —Christy T. 7.

This one. All rights reserved. Oh wait…I’m adopted!” —Michelle C. 6.

Here are a few things that our Instagram readers found themselves saying at school that were…a little unexpected. Lopez, I got out of line so I could fart.”—Valerie L. 20. Once in my Physics class, the male teacher’s phone goes off with a very girly pop ringtone.

I didn’t know what it was so I asked, and the student replied, “Idiot.” —Lana G. 5. Posted by Julie Mason. HS Bio teacher had us doing Punnett Squares and he asked a girl what the result would be if he crossed his “Big P, Big P” with her “Little V, Little V”. My mom has glasses! One of the more popular girls in school said, “eww that baby has boobs.” He was halfway across the room, stops, walks over to her and says, “Jealous?” Everyone busts out laughing.

My favorite teacher ever, assigned us to go see a movie.

This teacher was a gold mine of stuff like this.

", "One of my little 6-year-old students who weighed about 80 pounds at the time walked in late from recess. Register . Did you use an ‘I message’ with her? 6 Armstrong Road | Suite 301 | Shelton, CT | 06484. “Ms. Ideas, Inspiration, and Giveaways for Teachers. One kid finishes within the first five minutes.

Classroom Coding & Robotics … Everything You Need to Get Started, Protected: Classroom Talk-to-Text Project, My Problem With the Grit Movement and How I Think We Can Solve It, Childhood Trauma: Expert Answers to Tough Questions From Real Teachers, Join the WeAreTeachers Influencer Network. I tried to appeal to his scientific side by telling him about a study about how clutter affects the brain. So I said, 'Sort of. Chances are you have repeated these phrases more times than you can count (or would like to remember). ", "I teach elementary band, and once we were preparing for a playing test when one student said, 'Man, I need to practice.'

Enjoy!

Plus, the most surprising things teachers say. '", "On Fridays, preschoolers and kindergarteners get their faces painted in the afternoon. Just scratching away while talking to the class.

The teachers of Reddit have recently been asked, "What are some of the dumbest things your students have ever said?"

I wonder what the record is for the number of times a student sharpened a pencil during class. ", "One of my 7th graders asked me where babies come from, and another student replied, 'Well, when a Mommy and Daddy love each other very much...they get a bottle of scotch and a cheap motel room. "I wore a Captain America shirt to school for 'Super Hero Day,' and one of my students said I looked … First day of class he’s laying down the rules. High school english teacher with an eyepatch and a habit of propping one leg up on a chair to reveal his bulge. “Oh I can’t wear my new glasses in your class because it’s math. Am I missing something? She told the class, “I’m a MILF! While watching a Walking with Dinosaurs video, a student said to me, “Is this actual footage?” —Cate W. 4.

Discover unique things to do, places to eat, and sights to see in the best destinations around the world with Bring Me! Kids and teenagers definitely say the darndest things — and there's no one in the world that knows that better than teachers.

Copyright © 2020. I was in spanish class last year, using my phone under my desk, when my teacher noticed. Something for everyone interested in hair, makeup, style, and body positivity. “Ladies, there is to be no makeup applied in my class.

She said later that she wasn’t embarrassed the first time but his apology made it much worse.

A mother I like to f***!” There was a 5 second pause before she said, “I should not have said that.” And she is a MILF by the way.

The first day of gym class the teacher told us all to stand on these numbered squares painted on the basketball court.

25 FUN FAMILY NIGHT IDEAS!

Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog.

Nothing is more frustrating than grading a giant stack of papers with missing names. While we can’t give you a nickel for every time you have to say them, know that you aren’t alone in trying to solve the greatest teacher mystery of all: why can’t the kids just read the directions? College finance class. —Vonni D. 9.

“We do not meow in the classroom” —@muchelle_steuber, “Backpacks are not to be used as slingshots.” —@fancypantsancy. We have tried every hack, tip, and trick, yet every class we find ourselves asking this question again and again.

One of those shake your head, “I can’t believe I said that out loud” moments.

I had a water bottle with a tea packet in it when a student asked me if it was beer. If only we got a response instead of an eye roll or the deer-in-the-headlights stare. Something for everyone interested in hair, makeup, style, and body positivity. We asked teachers from across the country to tell us what has been the most unusual thing they have said in the classroom and here are some of their candid and amusing responses. Julie Mason is a Senior Editor at WeAreTeachers. '", "I'm a math professor, and I had just finished a proof when I asked my students, 'Does everyone understand my choices?'

We know that building on students’ thinking is a best practice, and that’s why we ask this question all day long.

The teacher was suspended without pay later that week, 9 Toxic Traits It’s Time To Release From Your Life, 50+ Encouraging Muhammed Ali Quotes on Life, Friendship, and Boxing, 60+ Witty Mae West Quotes On Men, Sex, and Love, Chris Watts Doesn’t Like How He Was Portrayed In ‘American Murder: The Family Next Door’, The Simple Days Of Youth Are Over, But That’s Okay. The teachers of Reddit have recently been asked, "What are some of the. 'I'm from Europe — it's different for us. Got more things teachers say? Obsessed with travel?

", "Once when I worked as a lunch lady, one of my favorite kindergarteners was getting ready to run out for recess when I stopped her and said, 'Hannah, you should wash your face before you go out — there's spaghetti sauce all over it.'

Free Printable to Share With Families! Nearly everyone in her family is a teacher. Free Printable to Share With Families!

'". Dedicated to your stories and ideas.

Copyright © 2020.

Who let a camera crew film a baby coming out of a vagina, This is why people think male teachers are pedophiles, I can’t believe there are random drug tests at school, And we all know what happened to the last one. Cows don’t have hands!”, This year while carving a pumpkin with my Pre-K 4 class, I was struggling cutting the top off with a big dull knife. “The battle of the bulge was a hard fought battle. ", "I wore a Captain America shirt to school for 'Super Hero Day,' and one of my students said I looked like Captain America before the injections. The kids are working.

From a middle schooler who doesn’t like school: “Miss Polly, you are okay for a teacher. Now I just write it in English.” —Monty P. 11. In theology class last week, two of my friends were sitting on a heater to try to warm up and our 80-year-old teacher told them to stop because it would dry out their vaginas. (Seriously, teachers, thank you and bless you.) All rights reserved. He surveys the class, sits down at his desk and tells us, “Gentlemen, it’s always the bitch’s fault.”.

One little girl asked to be God. On our WeAreTeachers Instagram, we got to talking about all of the crazy things we find ourselves saying during the work day.

I go to a private all girls school.

One of my students yelled out, “Oh no!

He said to me very loudly so everyone could hear, “I bet if there was a steak on it you’d find your square!” I still hate him to this day. “I don’t know my ancestors because I’m only 8, but when you were alive during the Pilgrim time did YOU know my ancestors?” —Sarah E. 8. We recently asked our teachers on Facebook to share some of the most funny and outrageous things that students have said to them. We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing.

?” —@jacque_jac, “Please stop putting things inside his cast. So let's give it up for these brave teachers, who have tamed and educated hundreds of brassy kids, while still managing to keep their sense of humor (and sanity) intact.

Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! On second thought…don’t imagine the pre-adolescent boners we would get…. —@brittany_brethauer, “Don’t drink from the urinal.” —@lward2226, “We don’t pee in the garbage can.” —@kerilacy, “Do not eat popcorn in the bathroom.” —@jarnpirate2011, “You cannot sharpen your finger.” —@melissa.malicious, “Why did you sharpen your finger?” —@reiskybusiness, “That was rude of her to fart on your pencil. His face brightened, and he said, 'Well, last year I KNOW it was September 31st! Self care and ideas to help you live a healthier, happier life. Some responses have been edited for length and clarity.
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